is your mom at the bar?
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
Randomize
