dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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