I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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