At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
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