Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
no, he came in my armpit
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
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