u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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