when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Randomize
