i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
