I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Randomize