Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Randomize
