she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
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