the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
