I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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