Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Randomize
