The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
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