Joe is yelling at the trees again.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
