Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
