just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
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