Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Randomize
