I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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