Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
Randomize
