did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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