it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
‪So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?‬
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
