I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
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