Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Randomize
