How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Randomize
