If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Randomize
