I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Randomize
