I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
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