in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
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