At least make sure they are 18
Why
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Randomize
