accomplished twins. life is a go
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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