did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Randomize
