i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
