He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
It's like God shit irony all over that family
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
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