i just wanna soil my oats bro
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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