her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33.
you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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