I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
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