In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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