Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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