I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
