she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Randomize