omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
