Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
You were trust falling into bushes
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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