I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
So. Much. Porn.
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