I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
