if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
Randomize
