so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
