What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
Sacagawea was the original milf.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
