Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
