Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
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